They are returning: the Sleepless Ones. Lumbering towards me, large, furry, with eyes closed. Getting Closer. What will they do once they find me?

Prolly not a whole lot: shake me and lift me from the ground – because they're so much bigger than I. I can never figure out whether they are friends or enemies. I think they're just lonely and see me as a soft mark. Well, ok. I kinda like the big furry beasts. I don't care if no one else does, and now, I've managed to set up my life so I can entertain them.

Oh mother, let me hold you.
Oh mother, I want to rock you.
Be my baby.
Be my son.

Mother, I want to rock you.

Don’t cry.

Please.

Can you not cry, just this once?

How can I ever comfort you if I am nothing but your daughter? Don’t you get it?

I can’t comfort you if you won’t let me become you.

So do me a favour: smile from the depths of your being. I know you didn’t love my father. Maybe that was hard for me to accept as a kid but you must realize that my father was MY FATHER! Not yours.

You chose him for whatever – oh, you didn’t. It was either him or a life as handmaiden to your brothers and sisters. Would it have been a life more lonely than the pining, keening, curling and clenching loneliness of the farm? The farm! That was the crux, wasn’t it?

You did not want to go back to the farm. It was not one of those decisions that you could change your mind about, once it was done.

The pain will soon pass because I will it to pass. That is, I recognize that a life without pain is more valuable than a livelihood that it hurts to pursue; therefore, I will pursue a livelihood that doesn’t hurt – a livelihood that increases my health, even. It’s one thing to have financially rewarding, somewhat socially and spiritually rewarding work, but another entirely to have financially, socially and spiritually rewarding work.

In the past, I’ve pursued spiritually and socially rewarding work - together and apart; however, it’s always been at the expense of Demon Money. It’s time to bring them all together. Demon, meet Saint; Saint, meet Demon.

Image from: forum.mmosite.com